When the Pizza Guys Order Out... you should too

Ray's looks like your typical New York streetfront pizza parlor; it has a few stools and some benches outside. Many different slices are on display for reheating. It reminds me of a place around the corner from me called Frank's- nothing special, but dependable for a slice on the go. It's next to the A&P in Bloomfield, so there's easy parking. That's about all that places like Frank's and Ray's have going for them. They're reliably mediocre. But how bad can pizza be that the people who run the place order out?

Chinese delivery at Famous Ray's in Verona

I found out when I stopped in this Sunday. They ordered Chinese, and I snapped a photo. I dunno how Ray got famous, maybe for letting his pizzas dry out in the display case? My crust was crumbling apart. As for taste, it was decent chow. Not much to differentiate it from a Sbarro's or Villa Pizza, really. That's the problem in New York- there are a billion pizzerias, so for every Lombardi's or Grimaldi's, there are three dozen corner cockroach casas slinging pie. And they're so convenient. So "New York style pizza" in New Jersey usually means this kind of place.
They're good for something- when you get outstanding pie from a dough-slinging pizza craftsman, you not only know it, but you're thankful. While Bloomfield Ave in Montclair is a nice restaurant row showcasing everything from excellent sushi, good BBQ, tasty Cuban, soul, fish fry, deli, Turkish, breakfast and much more, it does not have a pizzeria of note. A grave shortcoming in a spot where a nice stroll could be in order. It would be nice to order a slice of Napoletano style, like from Queen Margerita or Michael's in Nutley, or even a standard Jersey thin slice like from Three Guy's in Belleville.

So if you go into a Chinese takeout place and see them getting pizza delivered, you might want to go someplace else.

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Greasy Spoons: Ann's Snack Bar, home of the Ghetto Burger

The "best hamburger" is a subjective thing. Some people like little burgers, like White Castles; some like classic simplicity, such as The Burger Joint at the Parker Meriden NY; others want the most expensive ingredients, such as the $150 burger at The Burger Shoppe, crafted for coke-snorting Wall Street douchebags who think wagyu (aka Kobe) beef is meant to be ground into a burger. And still others like monstrosities. But even the Wall Street Journal sees through the pompous facade of a foie gras topped wagyu burger when simple fresh ground chuck has always been the foundation of a fine hamburger. They declared that the best was not to be had in New York, but on the outskirts of Atlanta, at a tiny unassuming roadstand called Ann's Snack Bar. I was immediately intrigued. This is not like some college slob saying that the truck near his dorm has the best hamburger, because it's the nearest slop his pot-addled brain can find when he gets the munchies. This is an esteemed newspaper run by the nasally whining snobs who've been the butt of jokes since Animal House and beyond. And if they'll deign to tiptoe into a working-class joint like this, where Ann reigns like an unpretentious Soup Nazi, I had to check it out.



Business sent me to Atlanta- which may have horrible traffic, but makes up for it with a spate of excellent restaurant finds. Love sushi? Go to MF Sushi, aka Magic Fingers sushi. I had some of the best since my visit to Tokyo there; Osaka-style pressed lobster rolls and ama ebi to die for. Want a raw bar and a great beer selection? Head to Six Feet Under, which has local Sweetwater beer on tap (my fave being the Blue, with blueberries) and buckets of oysters, clams and peel 'n eat shrimp ready to roll. But for burgers, there's only one place to go, and that's Ann's.

Off a slightly decrepit county highway you'll find a likely jam-packed parking lot hiding a diner car with a porch extension built onto it. Park properly and politely, and don't leave a dog in your car. And heaven help you, don't talk on your cell phone while you're waiting. You'll be out on your burger-less ass. Miss Ann runs a tight ship. While I waited, one guy was kicked out for talking loudly on his phone, and another guy had his dog in the back of his truck. When you manage to get in, act like a guest in her house, like she's invited you over to a backyard party, and you'll be alright.

She's most famous for the Ghetto Burger- a slow-cooked 1 pound patty of fresh, never frozen ground beef, topped with chili, cheese and a few slices of thick bacon cooked in the fryer. The meat is liberally seasoned from a container with the label removed, but my guess is Lowry's or similar, with cayenne. You'd best be patient. It takes a long time, ten or fifteen minutes, once your burger is on the grill- this keeps it juicy, so grab some sweet tea or fruit drink with your order, sit on a stool, and wait. I brought a paperback, to keep me from fiddling with my Blackberry.

Miss Ann may have her peculiar ways, but she makes a great burger that barely fits on the plate, for a mere $7. I cut mine in half and still had trouble wrapping my mouth around it. It is best described as a double bacon chili cheeseburger, and it served as lunch and dinner that day. Without fries. It's huge, filling, and delicious. I've had a 1-pounder burger before at Krug's Tavern, Down Neck in Newark- theirs isn't bad, but Ann's blows it out of the water. Your typical chili cheeseburger with bacon drowns any beef flavor out with a cavalcade of toppings, but Ann's seasoning lets the beef ring through. It tastes like something your mom made for you, if she catered to your hyperbolic demands. The soft bun, the crispy bacon, the tangy chili and the quick zap of cayenne on the meat before the juicy beef mellows everything out- it's one hell of a burger.

I think that's a big part of the appeal of Ann's; it is down home cooking. While she has her rules and may snap at you if you break them, she was a sweet lady when I came to visit, and blushed when I took her picture. Ann has a good sense of humor, too- calling the place a "snack bar" when all she serves is huge burgers- and there's no hipster irony in calling it a "ghetto burger." She's obviously proud of the reputation her cooking has built, and after thirty years of slinging burgers on the grill for neighborhood folks, getting folks visiting from all around is a bit of a surprise. The next time you're in Atlanta, you deserve a Ghetto Burger. Split it with a friend. She also makes other variants with cole slaw, or even a plain jane if you like. A place like the Varsity might be more famous, but a cozy joint like Ann's Snack Bar is an unforgettable experience.

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Greasy Spoons: Gray's Papaya

For some, Nathan's is the ultimate hot dog mecca in New York; others flock to gourmet upstarts like Crif Dog, home of the bacon-wrapped tube steak. But on Manhattan, where every corner has a pushcart slinging dirty water dogs, there can be only one- Gray's Papaya, home of the Recession Special, 2 dogs and a drink for three-fifty.
We ended up there after seeing The Goonies on Pier 46 at River Flicks last Friday, and it was definitely worth the walk. Two seared franks loaded with kraut mustard and onions, with one of their fruit drinks- the titular Papaya, or perhaps the sublime coconut champagne- and your search for post-drinking food is sated, at a bargain price.

The recession special

Gray's started in 1973 and has been a landmark since- with three locations along the West side, if you're in the Village, near Lincoln Center, or near Times Square you're set. It's not as old as Papaya King, which started in 1931, but like another relative newcomer, Grimaldi's Pizza, it consistently gets voted #1 over its aged forebears.Eye-rollingly good.

They don't offer chili, cheese, or relish like Papaya King, but their roasted pups and their sweet onion sauce stand great on their own. They're a little on the small size- your typical Sabrett's weenie slathered with mustard, a mere 3 or 4 bites- but they're full of flavor and deserve their legendary status. They go perfectly with their Papaya drink, but there's banana daiquiri, orange, grape, pina colada, and of course, the effervescent Coconut Champagne to choose from. And don't forget, the Papaya drink is made from the aristocratic melon of the tropics.

Admittedly, much of the mystique surrounding Gray's is nostalgia, but it's the quintessential NYC hot dog. Roasted like the original Nathan's, but with it's own characteristic flair. It may not be as filling or wild as a Puka Dog, but until the Hawaiians invade, Gray's will be safe.

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The Waterfront Alehouse

A dozen or more great beers on tap, ranging from Belgian whites to local crafts or rare foreign delights, home made Granny's Apple Pie vodka and rum punch, and a blackboard spread of daily specialties with a Southern flair, this is not your average gastro-pub. Smack on the corner of 2nd and 30th, between Kip's Bay and Murray Hill, this neighborhood gem of a saloon was a random find when Firecracker and I met up with my stepsister, Mitch Bitch. MB was in town for a conference and as a blonde out-of-towner, she is doubly handicapped when attempting to use the subway, so we had to find someplace close.

The Waterfront Ale House seemed a likely candidate for a bite and a beer, and despite a harried waitress having trouble seating us at first, it was a fine time on a Friday night. The blackboard listed their weekly beer selections and daily meal specials, which all sounded quite tempting. For meals we had a crabmeat, spinach, cheese and crawfish dip with toasted baguette, a fried oyster po'boy with wasabi mayo, and a grilled veggie sandwich with fresh mozzarella on focaccia, with sweet potato fries. The decor is old woods and snug tables, with dozens of sauce bottles rimming the walls, including HP Fruity, which would go perfectly on one of their signature wild game burgers.

The food was excellent- the crab dip was warm and cheesy, a bit salty but thick and chunky with white lump crab, served in a crock so you could scoop out every bit. The oyster po'boy rivaled some I had in Louisiana- the oysters were succulent and just cooked through, dusted with cornmeal for a crispy bite and a juicy center. The baguette was just chewy enough with good crust, and there was just the right amount of tang in the mayo. It came with house-made mustard cole slaw that was light and unique, with big chunks of crisp cabbage. MB's veggie sandwich was quite good, cooked in olive oil and still fresh-tasting- portobello, eggplant, squash with a nice melted slice of fresh mozz and good focaccia bread that wasn't too greasy. The sweet potato fries were excellent, some of the best I've tasted- full of flavor, just crisp enough, with no soggy ones to be found. The sweet potato flavor really came through, you could tell they were fresh made.

Milan the Bartender is happier than he looks.

The menu board had many other temptations- wild game is a specialty, and a buffalo burger with house-made ketchup was the night's burger; they also had venison chili, and venison sausage, pork chops in a blueberry bourbon sauce, and others. Their regular menu leans more toward standard bar fare with a tilt at wild game, bratwurst and barbecue. The beer selection is one of the best I've had at a restaurant, including the infamous Spotted Pig, which has a more daring, hedonistic menu and casked ales. I sampled 5 or 7:

Flying Dog Doggie Style pale ale, the beer of the week, was a hoppy IPA with good flavor, amber color and malty notes. Weihenstephaner Hefeweizen was on tap and is always a classic, but my faves were the Palm Amber and Brooklyn Helles Keller. The Palm is a fine dark Belgian, a hoppier brown. The H-K is a real find, but it seems that Brooklyn Brewery made it special and won't be making it again. It's worth a visit to this alehouse to try, if you like their beers. It's like a punched-up pilsner, reminiscent of the superior Keller Pilsner that High Point Brewery also made as a one-shot. Let's hope this style garners popularity and both breweries add these to their rosters permanently. Other Belgians I had were the Gruut Amber and an excellent white that was similar to Delirium Tremens.

Many drinks later...

The gals had vodka-cranberry and Stoli Blackberry as usual, but did try shots of the house-flavored Granny's Apple Pie vodka, which was a bit strong but very tasty for a straight vodka shot. It reminded me of homemade cherry vodka I've had a the Metropole Russian restaurant in Minneapolis. They steep apple slices and spices in it, imparting a golden color and lots of flavor. The homemade Caribbean Rum Punch was fantastic and potent, too. Lots of fruit juices and a hell of a kick. Our bartender was Milan, a friendly guy who we closed the joint with. He was drinking anejo with a chaser, and we talked for a long while. It's a place we'll definitely visit again. 3 meals and drinks all night was about $55 each, and we drank a lot.
So much that on the way home we accosted two gals visiting from Australia, and chatted them up for who knows how long.

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NYC Restaurant Week at Delmonico's

This week and the next are Restaurant Week in New York. Dozens of popular restaurants are offering 3-course dinners for $35 per person, and lunches for $20 or so. Last year we opted for the excellent One if by Land, Two if by Sea, and followed it up with a tasting with wines shortly after- that's the "catch," really; after your bargain dinner you'll be back dropping $400 on a gastronomic gallivant through their menu.

Delmonico's is a historic restaurant that opened in the Financial district in 1837; they claim to have invented Lobster Newberg, Chicken à la King, Baked Alaska, Eggs Benedict, and of course, the Delmonico cut of steak. All have faded into culinary history but are still quite tasty if on the rich side, unless you're getting your Chicken à la King out of a can, which is possible these days. Their clientele included such luminaries as Mark Twain, "Diamond" Jim Brady and Lillian Russell, Charles Dickens, Oscar Wilde, Teddy Roosevelt and Nikola Tesla. Several dining rooms are named after them, and the place looks as it should- dark, elegant, with classic woods and papers, unassuming tables and white linen. Dining with history.

Nowadays it's more of a power broker haven than one for the cognoscenti, stuck on the corner of Beaver Street between William and South William, in the jumbled tip of old Manhattan. The building resembles the Flatiron in ways, and speaks of old New York. They may not be inventing the dishes bound to become future classics anymore, but they still run a fine kitchen of American standards, and still have a few cards up their sleeve.

They give you a good tease with their Restaurant Week menu; the choices aren't quite what you'd want, but we got a deal of a meal. We choose the tuna carpaccio and gazpacho appetizers. The soup was not cold, but rather lukewarm, tangy and given just a taste of lump crab and avocado cream. It had a rich tomato base flavor that didn't overwhelm the crab. My tuna was a delicate pink sliver that resembled hamachi and had a similar sweet flavor, well paired with some bitter greens. The thin cut of Parmesan cheese was forgettable, but I'm a cheese snob and expect reggiano to punch me in the face with flavor. This was mild enough not to stomp over the delicate tuna.

Second course, I'm afraid we both opted for the 8 ounce tenderloin; mine rare, hers medium well, which was more like medium rare. Sometimes the kitchen knows what's good for you. Firecracker ate her steak and enjoyed it anyway. Mine was a thicker baseball cut while hers was more of a standard tenderloin. Both had a decent crust and a rich beefy flavor, from good marbling. I would definitely try a full Delmonico sometime. It sat atop a rich slather of buttery garlic mashed potatoes, with nary a green in sight. Typical steakhouse- if you want to waste time on vegetables, get it à la carte.

Dessert is what really shined; the chocolate mousse and the caramel custard were both quite delicious. The caramel on my flan-like dessert had smooth buttery notes and great texture, though the custard was a bit eggy. Even after the tasty steak, it won over my tastebuds. Firecracker's mousse cake was quite good, with the rich chocolate on top of layers of smooth raspberry cream and milder chocolate cake. It was a bit difficult to eat easily, collapsing when you tried for all the layers, but it was worth the trouble.

Add two strong tonics- one gin and one vodka- and our bill came to $120 with a 20% tip. Not a bad deal for two 8oz filets at a fine dining establishment these days. If you love steak, you've got another week to try Delmonico's at a bargain price. Opentable will reserve seats for you free of charge, and around the corner on Pearl Street you can grab a brew at Ulysses, an Irish pub, if that's more your speed. They've got a bargain of their own- $95 for 2 lobster tails, 12 shrimp cocktail, and 20 each of clams and oysters for their raw seafood tower. But that's for next time. It's too bad Delmonico's couldn't put a Lilliputian Lobster Newberg cup in the appetizer column and a bit of Baked Alaska for dessert; though I suppose that's what they want you to come back for.

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Greasy Spoons: Chap's Pit Beef, Baltimore

I heard about Chap's on "Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives," via The Mouth from the South- a true connoisseur of barbecue. He couldn't make it, so I have to describe the culinary experience for him vicariously. Chap's is a great little find, and definitely worth stopping by if a road trip takes you through Baltimore.

Baltimore stoops to conquer

Up north we don't get BBQ joints of this caliber, except in rare circumstances. Even the normally reliable Munchmobile of the Star-Ledger pointed me to Smitty's in Lyndhurst- and they do have decent barbecue for up here, but nothing to write home about. About the same as Jim Dandy's in Nutley. Falls off the bone, but has that spongy quality that tells you it's been injected with sauce to get it tender. It's much better to head to Montclair's Indigo Smoke, which may be a bit pricey for 'cue, but serves up the real deal. If you cross the Hudson, MoGridder's in the Bronx, and Brother Jimmy's in 5 locations now, are all good bets.

Pit Beef & sausage sandwich will cure all ills

But in Baltimore I'd say try Chap's. Baltimore has their own barbecue creature called Pit Beef. I first heard of it in John Waters' movie Pecker, and was finally reminded when I watched Guy's show. If you ride past the Fell's Point area down Orleans, past the typical Balitmore row houses with their white stone 3-step stoops, a few more blocks down Pulaski you'll find this unassuming box next to a gentleman's club. You'll follow the smoky scent of charred meat past around the parking lot, and inside you'll find a real picnic table, a few gambling machines, and huge pumps of BBQ sauce and ketchup. The wooden walls painted red and purple, looking like they've absorbed countless amounts of grill fumes. A sign above reads, "The only difference between this place and the Titanic... was they had a band." So yeah, a real dive.

Boss Man had the ribs, which he said had too much sauce. I opted for a pit beef sandwich with hot sausage on a kaiser roll, having seen the show and lusted after one ever since. They also have a "Guy Special" now with corned beef, pit beef and turkey. We got mac 'n cheese and rice pudding as well. The sandwich was excellent, and really, if you come here you have to have the pit beef and sausage. They are outstanding.

Perfection

The beef is juicy (I had mine medium rare) and flavorful, never stringy or chewy. The sausage is spicy and has good smoky flavor, and they slice it into three slabs so your sandwich doesn't fall apart. The poppy seed kaiser roll is strong enough to hold it all together and not get mushy, even if you slather it with their BBQ sauce. Don't use too much sauce, the meat is tasty enough. The mac 'n cheese was dry and tasteless, but the rice pudding was thick, creamy and not too sweet. Just enough cinnamon, and the small size was pretty filling.

A little too saucy for me, Bearnaise.

On a Monday afternoon there was little crowd, but like a good truck stop, you could tell this was a hidden gem. It reminded me of Ann's Snack Bar in Atlanta, home of the ghetto burger. That place deserves a "blast from the past" blog post, and will get one soon. This is a must-visit in Baltimore. A combo sandwich on a kaiser will make a big lunch or a good sized dinner, and you can walk it off at Fort McHenry National Park, just a few miles away, if you want the exercise.

By the pit beef's surly bite

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Greasy Spoons: Lil Burgers of Nutley

Little Burgers are an East Coast institution. Out west they have Fatburger, In-N-Out, Bob's Big Boy; here we have White Castle, and a few other tiny burger "systems" that popped up around the same time in the 50's. We had a Blue Castle in Passaic, and the all but forgotten char-broil pits along the Route 3-Route 46 corridor, such as the Red Chimney, the Three Acre Grill, the Anthony Wayne; and we still have a White Rose System in Highland Park, the competing White Mana and and White Manna burgers of Jersey City and Hackensack, and the White Diamond down in Linden.

6 lil burgers and sweet tater fries.

Lil Burgers is in that class- tiny little burgers, but with a meaty grilled beef patty unlike White Castle's infamous mystery slider. On the main drag of Nutley, my hometown from whence Martha Stewart sprang like a decorating demon in a cloud of brimstone and potpourri, it's a little gem of a burger joint that is worth braving the Guido and skater punk crowd of Franklin Avenue to get to.

Tucked between a guido bar and a TCBY

The owner, Tony, told me they use fresh meat every day- and you can taste it. They taste like home grilled, and are served on Hawaiian sweet rolls, with cheese, pickle and ketchup if you desire. It gives them a homemade taste, and while it takes longer than a fast-food place, it is definitely worth the wait.

The owner takes an order.

The crew is friendly and fast, and the place is cafeteria style but still cozy. The walls are decorated with aerial photos of the area, from well-known landmarks like Giants Stadium, to forgotten icons of the local past like the legendary ITT Tower, torn down in the late 90's.

The crew, and an order up.

The menu also includes sweet potato fries, shrimp, hot dogs, chicken, and cheese steak sandwiches. The fries were good- especially the sweet ones. I was expecting more toppings, or a "slider" type restaurant with a lot of trendy little expensive sandwiches, but this is the real deal- little burgers grilled to perfection, on the simplicity of the sweet soft gummy rolls. No mango-pepper aioli or peppadew chutneys here. Part of me wanted to see a pork roll burger but they're smaller than a cooked slice of Taylor ham, just barely. And they're tasty enough on their own.

The menu- 99 cents still buys you something good.

So, brave the wilds of Nutley. Watch out for popped collars and pointy hair, and BMW M3's and Mustang GT's as they cruise the ave. Your best bet is to park in the municipal lot behind the Nutley Diner, and walk through the alley. When we were there it was a shady haven for skaters in the hot sun. On the way home you should pick up some fresh pasta at Garruto's, or home-made mozzarella. There's an Applegate Farms ice cream shop around the corner, where the Baskin-Robbins used to be, if you saved room for dessert. Just mind your P's and Q's, the police don't take kindly to you out-of-towners.

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The Best Mac & Cheese Ever

We went to Les Halles downtown again recently. This time I had the aged Gruyere mac 'n cheese. As a lover of Gruyere cheese, this was simply amazing. It's a bit filling, so share it and a bucket of their awesome mussels with someone. One caveat with the menu- the fish 'n chips. For shame, Tony- they served potato chips. I don't care if they do that in Paris, but you should be serving your famous fries (er, frites) with it! In Paris, Monsieur Pluque never ordered fish 'n chips.

A small complaint. The mac 'n cheese crust was so good that if there was a ribbon of it around the equator, I'd still be eating it like Wimpy following a line of hamburgers, somewhere in Africa. (Making me an equatorial guinea, ha ha!)

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Greasy Spoons: Taste of Portugal's Steak on a Stone

From an unassuming little building in Newark's Ironbound section, you can get some of the best steaks you've ever had. I've been to a few of the top-rated steakhouses in America-- Manny's in Minneapolis, the Chicago Chop House. But for half the price I've had a fantastic marbled filet cooked just the way I want it, without worrying about reservations or throwing on a sport jacket. At Taste of Portugal on Delancey Street.

If you've eaten in the Ironbound, you're familiar with Portuguese restaurants, famous for their rodizio, the unending delivery of grilled meat on huge skewers, sliced directly to your plate. Those that don't offer that up often have similar menus full of platters of steaks and seafood, huge slabs of sea bass or bucket-sized bowls of paella, the obligatory appetizers of charred Portuguese sausage, and the platters of potatoes, rice and vegetables shared on the table. Here you get the standards trimmed into a concise yet varied menu that touches all the meat groups, including a goat leg appetizer and occasional deliveries of wild boar. If the boar is offered, all bets are off- skip the steak and have it.
Their flagship dish is the Steak on a Stone, a baseball sized filet with good marbling. It comes on a searing hot slab of black granite heated in their ovens, and arrives at the table raw. Your server slices it into four smaller chunks and places them on the stone to sizzle, and tops them with huge chunks of garlic herb butter. If you like, they will stay to flip the pieces for you. If you're a hands-on diner who would rather eat the stone than a well-done steak, you can flip them yourself. I opted to be the captain of my own destiny, and was rewarded with a terrifically tender filet mignon slathered in creamy butter.

The side is red beans and rice with chunks of Portuguese sausage, and a gravy boat of mushroom sauce; not a green in sight. Our appetizer was a special of shrimp and pineapple; this turned out to be shrimp cocktail, with half-round chunks of pineapple and twirled slices of prosciutto. The salty slices where not di parma, but the drier, thicker kind. It all went well together but was nothing spectacular, except for the huge shrimp. The desserts are good but average, including Italian specialties like tartufo and tiramisu, plus Portuguese ones like serradura, which I found sort of bland.

If you want a great and unique steak meal for a mere $26.95, hie yourself down to the Ironbound section and get to Taste of Portugal. You won't regret it.

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Greasy Spoons: Sake Bar Hagi

All the best Japanese places I've been to in New York are underground. Sake Bar Hagi is a Japanese gastropub of sorts- Tokyo comfort food and $11 pitchers of Sapporo and Ki-rin is the fare. I've wanted to go here since Anthony Bourdain mentioned it on his New York show with Andrew Zimmern. It's not far from Radio City and Times Square, secreted in a basement hollow near a sushi bar, it's open till 3am, and serves quick bar food like chicken yakitori for $2 a skewer, a great bargain for sit-down bar food in NYC.

"We sell forbidden objects from places men fear to tread.."

The last time we came, there was a line out the door and up the stairs; this time we got lucky for a Saturday night after a show. We waited about 5 minutes for a corner table, and snugged in. The place is small and cozy and noisy with mostly Japanese patrons watching horse racing on big screen TVs, over platters of fried goodies and drinkin' foods. It reminded me of my short time in Tokyo and Niigata. I didn't hit many bars out there, in fact the one I remember was run by a Canadian ex-pat, with poutine served hot 'n gooey, and many shots of Canadian Club 12-year poured freely.

Belly up to the bar or snug into a table. No frogurt, though.

Here we perused the multi-page menu that had everything from fried slices of beef tongue (better than it sounds!) and spaghetti with ketchup (Japanese drunk food) to more familiar Japanese fare like gyoza dumplings and sashimi. The specials blackboard was thankfully written in Japanese and English, so we started off with a plate of Berkshire Pork dumplings, which were tender and tasty. Berkshire is a rare breed in England; the Japanese-bred pigs were brought over in the 1800's and are raised like Wagyu (Kobe) beef. It was hard to tell how marbled the pork was from a tiny bit in a dumpling, but they were very good. And only $4.

Yellowtail collar- grilled nummies in there.

It ends up being a lot like Dim Sum; they don't push carts around, but the menu is mostly appetizer sizes with a few big plates, like the chopped steak. The biggest plate we ordered was the Grilled Yellowtail collar ($7.50), which Bourdain raved about. It was excellent- rich and tender pieces of yellowtail to be plucked out from the bony collar with your chopsticks. Luckily, I picked around inside and found the biggest chunk hiding in there. It had the rich oily flavor of belly meat.

A shrimpstrosity

We sampled a few other appies too- the chicken yakitori meatball skewer ($2), a huge shrimp skewer ($4), and a huge potato croquette ($4) which was a bit bland but otherwise nice and crisp on the outside. The shrimp was flavorful but a little overdone, the meatballs were a great cheap bar snack. There's so much more on the menu, like okonomiyaki, takoyaki (fried octopus balls), and of course, may different kinds of sake. We had Sapporo, thanks. If they had Suntory Malt, my fave beer from Japan, I would have been thrilled.

Overall this is a great find, a cozy hideaway between Times Square and Radio City. Sort of like the Burger Joint at the Parker Meridien for those who love Japanese food. Or anything fried on a stick.

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Waitress

Firecracker had been bugging me to watch Waitress because she knows a set designer in it (Megan Baptiste), and of course because it's a refreshing romantic comedy-drama. Not to be confused with 1981's Waitress!, a Troma feature before they went all gore disgusto, this has a bevy of amusing characters in a small-town "pie diner," where they serve 26 kinds of pie and specials daily. Sounds like a fatboy's fairy tale, and the film does have that quality, reminiscent of the TV series "Pushing Daisies" minus the supernatural. The movie guarantees some laughs, and a case of the munchies. I like me some pie.

This had better not be another goddamn pie cookbook.

The story centers on Jenna (Keri Russell), a gifted pie baker working at a diner saddled with an unappreciative, control-freak husband, who finds out that she's knocked up. She inhabits the role so well that you forget she's acting. The emphasis is more on comedy than drama, and the cast is uniformly good. Andy Griffith plays a curmudgeonly old goat who owns the diner, Cheryl Hines (from "Curb Your Enthusiasm") plays a delightfully ditzy waitress, and Nathan Fillion (from "Firefly", and every nerd's secret man-crush) plays her new ob-gyn.

I just can't quit yer pie.

He later gets to inspect her in a less professional manner, and you keep wondering when hubby Earl, played as an abusive jerk by Jeremy Sisto, is going to find out and go postal. But he's not a Lifetime villain, he's a man with cripplingly low self-esteem, who has to control the one person who loved him so he can have some sort of self-worth. Even the jerk is well written. The director (Adrienne Shelly) plays a small part as a bespectacled co-worker who gets hitched with the town weirdo. Ogie, played by Eddie Jemison, is one of the funniest parts of the film; he starts out like a creepy stalker, but the script once again throws you a curve and lets him develop his eccentricities.

The douche and duchess

The set design and the awesome pies make the three-set movie nice to look at, and although it's a bit twee, it's still an enjoyable movie. It got a lot of hype after the director was murdered before it was released, and perhaps got overrated because of the pathos, but it's still a well-directed film and a good story. The script has a lot of clever dialogue, and may get predictable in places, but never bored me once. She may get a little over-empowered by the end, but it doesn't ruin what happened previously. This is a good way to spend 1¾ hours with some good comedic actors playing some likable characters.

If you don't stop whistlin' that theme song I'm gonna go Matlock on your ass.

Unfortunately, we've been robbed of seeing any more imaginative comedies from Adrienne Shelly. Diego Pillco, a 19-year old construction worker, strangled her to death when she caught him robbing her apartment. He was working on another apartment in the building, and went in to rifle through her purse. He even faked it as a suicide, hanging her up by a bedsheet in the shower. He's currently serving 25 years to life without parole. Perhaps one day he'll be found hanging in the shower there.

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Begone, foul words of the devil! Shrink it back.

MoGridder's BBQ and Auto Service

I'd been wanting to go to MoGridder's since I heard about it on the Food Network, on "Diner's, Drive-Ins and Dives." (As soon as the bleached-hair guy on the show has a heart attack, I'll swoop in and take over the show). It's out in the Bronx in Hunt's Point, where all the rental truck returns, auto shops, and chop shops are. It's one of the best rated rib joints in New York, and they offer a combo oil change and rack of ribs for $34.95-- a bargain in these days of $135 crude and rising food prices.
Since it was Saturday in New York, we ran into an impromptu parade and/or protest, a road closure, a crane blocking the street, and a street that the GPS did not know had changed into a one-way. We drove over with the top down, and I felt like Ace in Escape from New York, which is playing on UHD this month.
It's hard to miss. Parked in front of the auto shop on a 5 way corner is a fire-engine red trailer with a propane tank and smoker on the front. There's a big sign showing a hillbilly with his popgun chasing a pig riding a steer plastered on the side, and some picnic tables set up outside. If you want classier digs, around the corner in the auto shop is the "MoGridder's Lounge" which has tables and condiments, and a big wash sink to clean your sauce-encrusted mitts after gnawing the bones clean.

They serve the barbecue standards- ribs, brisket, pulled pork, chicken, and sausage. Firecracker got a pulled pork cheese steak with a side of potato salad, and I got a 2-meat plate of brisket and ribs, with beans and collard greens. They also serve fresh lemonade. It could be sweeter, but it's nice and refreshing. We lugged our prizes to the cushy lounge to keep watch over my double-parked car, and had ourselves a hearty lunch.

The ribs are damn good- meaty and tender without having that "fall off the bone" quality that means too much sauce, or injecting, in my book. The meat didn't need sauce to taste good, which is a must. The sauce was not too tomatoey or sweet, but had a nice smoky flavor. The brisket was delicious too, with good beefy flavor and just the right amount of fat. It was sliced too thin for my liking, and for $13 I expected more than 4 ribs and 4 thin slices of brisket. Next time I'll get a full rack, or we'll split one of the huge combos.

The pulled pork cheese steak was a thing to behold. The pulled pork was flavorful and tender, reminiscent of the Kalua pig from Hawaii. It came with peppers and onions, and enough Cheez Whiz to feed Philadelphia. It's a great idea, mixing the classic pulled pork sandwich with the Philly cheese steak, and it's worth driving into the Bronx for.
The sides were very good as well. The beans were spectacular, with tons of sweet smoke and spice. The collard greens were a little bland; they could have used some more bacon fat. They were tangy but mostly flavorless, like most collards, and a little too soupy. The potato salad was heavy on the mayo, northern style. The resident Southern belle wanted some egg or spice in there, so I used the last of my Tony Chachere's packets to spice it up. Overall it was a very good meal, a little on the pricey side for truck food, but we both left stuffed and sated and glad we made the trip.
It's worth the trouble, even if you don't have the map from The Brain telling you where the mines are on the Bridge. Brother Jimmy's might have more Southern specialties, but their ribs and beans aren't this good. There you can have an Abita, some peel 'n eat shrimp, or fried pickles... but good luck getting your oil changed. MoGridder's is unique road food, a little out of the way for most travelers, but where else can you get award-winning ribs and a tune-up while you wait?

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Begone, foul words of the devil! Shrink it back.

The Shaka vs. the Shocker, and the Southernmost Bar in the U.S.